Reunions

Reunion 2001

Saturday 21st April 2001

Following the decision to hold a get-together of our old friends in motorsport it was decided that it would have to be done properly and be held somewhere that would encourage fellow “veterans” to come along. There was no question that the Royal Scottish Automobile Club building in Glasgow would be ideal, if available. The RSAC had not just been the controlling body for Scottish Motor Sport but the building did hold many happy memories for a lot of veterans – sporting events as well as social occasions. Fortunately, it was available, and as it turned out our Reunion was probably the last major motorsport event to be held there before the building regrettably had to be sold. This was to be our first venture into the Reunion business. A major task facing us was getting in touch with the many people who had been involved in motorsport in the previous 40 to 50 years. There were probably very few people still involved who had started their motorsport career more than 25 years ago, so it was decided that 25 years was a reasonable “cut off” point to ask people who had been involved before that if they were willing to come along. Getting addresses was a long and complex process but was eventually done mainly by word of mouth. The “organisers” (Jimmy McInnes, Alan Carlaw, Stuart Parker, and their wives Arlene, Audrey and Mairi) all came primarily from a rallying background, although Jimmy did have racing connections. We were very conscious that we had to seek out people from all branches of the sport – not just rally people. As it turned out we were able to amass well over 400 addresses of people to had taken part in the sport in one capacity or another! Invitations were sent not just to Scottish participants, but many were sent to other parts of the world! It was very obvious from the start from the number of letters and emails we received that we had engendered a great deal of interest in our proposed venture. To add interest and hopefully a bit of competition to the event, the invitations took the form of ASR’s We suggested that people, if they wished, could bring along memorabilia to display. Both Mitsubishi Ralliart and Ford UK kindly offered financial assistance which helped considerably to keep costs down. At the end of the day, we were delighted to sign-in 221 veterans for the event plus partners. Entrants were divided into Classes according to when they had been involved. We did receive many letters and emails of congratulations for our effort in trying to run such an event. All in all 260 attended the Reunion! In addition, we received many apologies from Non-Starters. However, we were delighted to welcome many well-known competitors including Andrew Cowan, Jimmy McRae, John Cleland to mention only three. We were also pleased to welcome several representatives from Ford UK.

Moira Cameron, Audrey Carlaw, Arlene McInnes and Mairi Parker were in charge of Documentation in the RSAC. foyer, where signing-on took place. Members were issued with name badges, final instructions and a “Who’s Who” booklet of entrants together with their motorsport history, which each had been asked to submit with their Entry Form. Alan Carlaw’s photographic quiz caused a fair bit of head-scratching – some of the images were of considerable age! Many entrants just gave up and got on with the main business of the evening – meeting up with old competitors, or sharing a glass or three with friends.

Although we had a ‘schedule for the evening’ it was very soon abandoned – everyone was too busy reminiscingMany drifted to other parts of the building where things were a bit quieter and other activities such as the Ford Rally simulator could be enjoyed. The Programme contained the schedule for the evening together with a list of Starters, Classes and apologies. Also attached are a few emails and letters of interest to view. Entrants were directed upstairs to the reception in the Regent Lounge, there, people like Kenneth Fraser had set up tables with displays of their motor sporting experiences; a large screen showed many films of past races and rallies, including Bobby Crawford’s own cine-films with Bob’s commentary, which produced a fair amount of merriment!

Mairi Parker having a go on the simulator – and did very well!

Ford had kindly brought along their rally simulator which caused much interest and excitement for those willing to try their skills. Andy Watson was in charge of collecting the entry fee (at £2 a run). It was quickly obvious to the veteran drivers that experience with computer simulators would have been a great help. However, James Rae showed that he had lost none of his rallying skills and easily took the winners award. A magnificent glass encased Model- Ford replica (donated by Ford UK) was presented to James Rae by Andrew Cowan and Jimmy McRae. James was heard to remark to Jimmy McRae “Let Colin know that this was what I have been reduced to now – rallying on a simulator!” Back to top of this Article

Andy Watson who was in charge of the simulator, showing how it should be done.

The Model T given by Ford UK presented to Jimmy McRae as the winner on their simulator.

Eventually, everyone moved downstairs to the main dining area where a buffet supper had been provided. Towards the end of the meal Clerk of the Course, Jimmy McInnes, at last, welcomed everyone and thanked them for coming to the first Scottish Veterans Reunion. He hoped that they had found it, not just enjoyable, but a worthwhile experience which perhaps was worth repeating. Judging by the applause Jimmy received this thought was well received! Equally, loud applause greeted the late Nigel Kennedy when he went up to collect from Jimmy his prize for being the way-out winner of the Photographic Competition.

An unusually serious Jimmy McInnes welcoming all to what would be our very first Reunion.

Jimmy thanked those who had contributed to the success of the evening : Alan Carlaw for the production of the programme and the photographic quiz : those who had donated films and display memorablia : Mitsubishi Ralliart for financial support : Ford UK, not just for providing their RallySimulator and the magnificent Model T-Ford trophy, but also for their financial assistance : thanks were due also to the other programme advertisers – First Ford of Glasgow, Arnold Clark, Morrisons Garages Stirling, Tunnocks, Sandy McCracken & Son Ltd., Reliable Vehicles Limited, Ian Skelly and Westcars: and last but not least, the backroom “staff” who made the whole thing come to fruition.

Jimmy McInnes addressing the company. Jimmy McRae standing on his right

After supper people continued to talk and talk; a few still tried their hand at the simulator – but eventually, we all drifted off home having enjoyed a most memorable evening.

Footnote: After the dust had settled and sums had been added up, we found we had had a surplus which, along with the money from the simulator entries, enabled us to donate £475 to the Red Cross.

BACK TO THE REUNIONS INDEX

Programme

……….The Evening’s Schedule………

18.30 – 19.45 Documentation and Scrutineering, in the Foyer of RSAC

19.30 – 22.00 Competition

19.45 ‘Welcome’ in Regent Room . . . . . . . .J.W. McInnes

19.30 – 23.30 Video Show in Regent Lounge (upstairs)

20.00 – 22.00 Buffet

22.30 Prizegiving, in Regent Room

23.30 Parc Ferme opens for release of Zimmers, Wheelchairs, white sticks, etc.

Ford Half Buck Simulator Competition

Entry to this Competition, which is separate from the main event, is by donation of £2 per ‘drive’, the proceed of which will go to a local Charity. This competition will run throughout the evening. A prize, donated by Ford Motor Company who kindly provide the Simulator, will be awarded to the lucky (?) winner.

2001 ASRs

Entrants and Classes

……..Couldn’t Manage

We received a number of apologies to the ‘Invitation’ we sent out to ‘Veterans’ of Scottish Motor Sport. Below are some we received. Most have had had previous engagements such as holidays or were unable to come for other reasons. Virtually all expressed their regret in not being able to attend, but wished every success for the evening.

Ian Birrell, Helensburgh

Jenny Birrell, Shalstone, Bucks

Graham Bisset, Kincardine

Bill Borrowman, Edinburgh

Arnold Clark, Glasgow

Bill Clarkson, Balfron

Geoff Duncan, Bridge of Weir

Barry Filer, Glasgow

Graham Gauld, Claviers, France

Sandy Gentles, Perth

Ian Hawthorn, Uplawmoor

Colin Hope, Helensburgh

Ian Hutchison, Newton Mearns

Frank Inglis, Largs

Tony Luck, Perth

Alan Lundholm, Torrance

Hugh McCaig, Penicuik

George McCartney, Motherwell

Gray Mickel, Moscow, Ayrshire

Bill Millar, Glasgow

Tony Mitchell, Strathaven

Ian D. Muir, County Clare, Eire

Andy Munn, Glasgow

Mervyn Nicol, Perth

Ian Preston, Clarkston

George Ritchie, Newton Mearns

Ian Stewart, Crieff

Jackie Stewart,O.B.E., Milton Keynes

David Thomson, Duns

Gerry Ward, Kilmacolm

A few quotes from emails and letters received

‘What a shame that we now qualify for the Veterans Tag!…….
………………… Graham Lees, Lendelfoot

‘……a good idea to reminisce about Motor Sport when it was a Sport and not big business. I couldn’t afford a trailer and tow car when I was rallying!!!!’
………………………Fred Hibberd, Dundee

‘………..good idea to have such a reunion before we Old Boys pop off’
…………Ronnie Dalgleish, Auchterarder

‘make sure there is parking space for my zimmer, that the name tags are in 48pt type!” type!’ ………………...Wendy Jones, Edinburgh

‘……….. most prestigious event of the Motor Sport Calendar’
……………….. Alex Houliston, Barrhead

‘What a splendid idea! Almost respectability at last!!’
……………………...Ian Smillie, Milngavie

‘………McInnes will remember the night in North Berwick or was it Dunbar, when Ella helped to debag Jimmy!!’
…………… Bobby Crawford, Milnathorp

‘……………….a blast from the past, on any scale!!’
……………….Willie Crawford, Lasswade

‘…..have a mega evening; my regards to anyone who remembers the ‘Good’ years in Scottish Motorsport and my antics!!!’
………………Jenny Birrell, Shalstone, Bucks

‘What a great idea………..could be the best event in the 2001 calendar’
……………..George Sangster, Montrose

‘Club events were good fun in those days, with a light-hearted approach to motor sport generally, apart from the occasional back-biting! Alas how things have changed…… recent Silverstone vs Brands Hatch drama certainly taught me a thing or two. In contrast your reunion will be a landmark of sanity, and I wish you well with it.’
………………………...Ian Stewart, Crieff

‘………getting my lightweight, racing zimmer ready for scrutineering!’
………………………Donald Brown, Cults

‘……..Less of the Veterans Please. Look forward to a good night’
……………………John Cleland, Melrose

‘Reading the names alone has raised nostalgic memories – Oh Happy Days’
……………………..Andy Munn, Glasgow

‘great idea…….look forward to an evening of hilarity and boasting.’
………………….Fred Lobnitz, Stewarton

News

Newsletter – September, 2020

It seems a long time since I had any relevant information to send you about VSMA. In fact I had problems even remembering how to put the Newsletter together! I presume you have had a look at Tom Coffield’s very full page.

Fortunately, I have had NO deaths to report this month, which is a pleasant change.

I expect you are all getting more than fed up with the lockdown and sheltering, we certainly are but still speaking each other!

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New Member:

I am delighted to welcome the a new member to the Association. You may have already seen his details in the Members List on our website, have a look:

Peter Shankley

I was more than delighted to receive an article from Peter Shankley on his Motorsport exploits to date, he has added some very interesting personal Motor Sport stories to the”Tales from the Past” section. Worth a look.

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Some Funnies:

Again, in the absence of anything to report in the VSMA world, here a few things to lighten up your day!

From my niece: This made me laugh

Primary School Children Writing About The Sea

1) This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

2) Oysters’ balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

3) If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island . If you don’t have sea all round you, you are incontinent. ( Wayne age 7)

4) Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily Richardson. She’s not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

5) A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of its head. (Billy age

6) My dad goes out in his boat, and comes back with crabs. (Emily Burniston age 5)

7) When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn’t blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans. (William age 7)

8) I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

9) I’m not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big sister has just got pregnant, so I can’t think what to write. (Amy age 6)

10) Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting, Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

11) When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy small. (Kevin age 6)

12) Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can’t go down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age

13) On holiday my Mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won’t do it again because water shot up her fanny (Julie age 7).

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From Bill Barr:

82 year-old Morris went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, ‘You’re really doing great, aren’t you?’

Morris replied, ‘Just doing what you said, Doc: ‘Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.”

The doctor said, ‘I didn’t say that.. I said, ‘You’ve got a heart murmur; be careful.’

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Thats all folks

Stuart Parker, August 2020 Back to top

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Remember, older news items can be found in the “Archived News Items” page. We would welcome additional photographs for any of the pages, but in particular we would love to be able to insert “mug shots” of people on their own page. This would let other members put a face to a name. So, if you have not already done so, dig out a recent photograph of your self and send it to me (in digital format) by email or send the original by post which I can copy and return to you.

If you would like to add anything (within reason) to the site, just send the copy to me and I will do the rest.

News

Newsletter – April, 2020

Dear member,

I would assume that many of you have been, like Mairi and I, confined to barracks for the last few weeks – and it looks like it may be a bit longer! As I have learned from my son in the USA, the News is not so good on the virus front – already he has been giving lectures on Covid-19 to fellow ex-graduates. Anyway, lets look on the bright side if we can!

Unfortunately we have had to cancel or at least postpone this years Spring Run to 2021. Hopefully nothing will change in the route or location headquarters through in Lundin Links, Fife. Those who have already entered have agreed that we keep their entry monies until next year – so many, many thanks. The Hotel too have filled in a date for us next spring – fingers crossed!

The adjacent photograph was taken of Stirling Moss driving the Vanwall at Knockhill in 2007. Shortly after that he was asked to join the ranks of VSMA, which he readily agreed to do. Unfortunately, his name has now been added to our PastVeterans. As most who have reported on his death, and who met him on occasions, he was a true gentlemen of Motor Sport and surely will be remembered as such.

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Deaths:

I am sad to report the following deaths which have been notified to me since the last Newsletter:-

Ian Cunningham, Edinburgh died 9th Nov, 2013

Bill Nolan, Larbert died August 2018

Charlie Brown, Killearn died 4th April, 2020

Trevor Park, Aberdeen died 5th April 2020

Stirling Moss OBE, London died on 18th April, 2020

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New Email addresses:

I bring to your attention the following changes;

George Deans is now at george.dean1@icloud.com

Robert McKenzie has changed to robmckenzie16@gmail.com

Charlie Young has changed his email address to charlieyoung2009@gmail.com

Jimmy McInnes has changed hi email address to jimmymac3114@gmail.com

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New Members:

I am delighted to welcome the following five to membership of the Association. Their details can be found on clicking their name in the Members List on the website:

John Brownie, Inverurie

David Duffield, Kirkliston, W. Lothian

Ron Cumming, Northfield, Aberde

Margaret Baillie, Mauchline

Nancy Crichton, Cumbernauld

Some Funnies:

In the absence of anything to report in the VSMA world I think a few things to lighten up your day would be appropriate – form contributing members!

Bill Barr didn’t think it would be very long before somebody came up with something relating to the virus, and here it is. It’s pretty cleaver. If you want to sing it, it goes quite well to the tune of Auld Lang Syne.

Tae A Virus

Twa months ago, we didna ken

Yer name or ocht aboot ye

But lots of things hiv changed since then,

I really must salute ye.

Yer spreading rate is quite intense,

Yer feedin like a gannet

Disruption caused, is so immense,

Ye’ve shaken oor wee planet.

Corona used tae be beer,

They garnished wae limes,

But noo it’s filled us awe wae fear

These days are scary times.

Nae shakin hawns, or peckin lips,

It’s whit they awe advise

But scrub them weel, richt tae the tips,

That’s how we’ll awe survive.

Just stay inside, the hoose ye bide

Nae sneakin oot for strolls

Just check the lavvy, every hoor

And stocktake your, loo rolls

Our holidays have been pit aff

Noo that’s the Jet2 patter,

Pit oan yer thermals, have a laugh

And paddle ‘doon ra waatter

Canary Isles! no fur a while

Nae need fur suntan cream

And awe because o’ this wee bug

We ken, tae be nineteen

The boredom surely will set in,

But have a read, or doodle,

Or plan yer meals for the month

Wi 95 pot noodles

When these run oot, just look aboot

A change, it would be nice

We’ve beans and pasta by the ton

and twenty stane o’ rice.

So dinny think ye’ll wipe us oot,

Aye true, a few have died,

Bubonic, bird flu and TB

They came, they left, they tried.

Ye might be gallus, noo ma freen,

As ye jump fae cup tae cup

But when we get oor vaccine made

Yer number, will be UP.

Jimmy McInnes found that once again The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly neologism contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternative meanings for common words

The winners are:
1. Coffee (n.), the person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have gained.

3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.

6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightgown.

7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle 👎, olive-flavoured mouthwash.

9. Flatulence (n.), emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon 👎, a Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), (back by popular demand): The belief that, when you die, your soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent (n.), an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.

The Washington Post’s Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

The winners are:

-Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

-Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

-Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.

-Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

-Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

– Karmageddon (n): It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these Really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.

– Glibido (v): All talk and no action.

– Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.

– Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you’re eating.

And the pick of the literature:
– Ignoranus (n): A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.

That’s all folks………………. !

Stuart Parker, April 2020 Back to top

News

Newsletter, December, 2019

Newsletter, December 2019

Can I refer you to Andrew Cowan’s page within the Past Veterans section of the site. The following obituary appeared in the Glasgow Herald on 30th October. and gives an excellent summary of Andrew’s life and motorsport career

Annual General Meeting – 6th December

As usual this was held in Boyd Tunnock’s establishment in Uddingston which commenced with a buffet supplied by Boyd including of course, pies, teacakes and Carmel wafers! The turnout was up slightly at 18 members and partners.

Chairman Jimmy McInnes welcomed everyone with the announcement that he was retiring as Chairman of VSMA. Jimmy had been Chairman since the beginning of the association in 2001. Following the reports from Chairman Jimmy, Secretary Stuart Parker and Treasurer Bob Baillie. The meeting went on to elect the new Executive Board which was as follows:

Chairman – Bob Baillie

Vice-Chairman – Barry Crichton

Secretary – Stuart Parker

Treasurer – Bob Baillie

Bob Baillie then took the chair and immediately thanked Jimmy McInnes for all his work and leadership over the formative. years of the association. He then proposed that Jimmy be made an Honorary Vice-President which was adopted unanimously.

Mid Bruce and Donald Gordon having stepped down from the Board saw the election of the following five members:

Ian Smillie, Jack Davidson, Duncan Paterson, Mike How and Chris Paton

they will join Hugh MacKinnon, Adele Patterson and Charlie Young who had remained as Ordinary Board members under Art 33 of the Articles of the Association.

Thereafter there was a general discussion of topics such as Reunions before the meeting closed after about 40 minutes!

Death of Member:

I am sad to inform you of the following deaths:

Betty Craig had died in 2017

Tom Prestly, Hamilton, in December 2017

Andrew Tymkewycz, Heriot, died 2018

Guenda Young, Islay, died on 15th October 2019

Angus Pattison, Glasgow, died 23rd October, 2019

Rob McKinna, West Linton, died November 2019

Andrew Cowan, Berwick-on-Tweed, died 15th October 2019

As you know the death of Andrew Cowan, our first Vice-Presidents, was felt by everyone in VSMA. He had been a true supporter of our organisation in many ways and will certainly be missed.

There will be a Memorial service to Andrew in Duns on Saturday 1st February, 2020 at 1pm.

Here is the official notice of this important event, click below to open this notice:

MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR ANDREW COWAN

New Member:

I am delighted to welcome the following to membership of the Association. Their details can be found on clicking their name in the Members List on the website:

Darren Banks, Anstruther

Bob Shearer, Perth

Robert Kelly, Malinger, Bucks.

Member’s contact changes and New Email addresses:

Alan Muir – has a new address and telephone number

Tony Fleming – wfleming_205@hotmail.co.uk

George Gibson – gtgibson@gmail.com

John McIntyre – McIntyre.john.1953@gmail.com

Pat Hilley – pathilley@hotmail.co.uk

Donald Heggie – mdheggie@icloud.com

Chris Edwards – edwards007@btinternet.com

Some more website Updates:

Ian McRae – updated Motor Sport history

Ronnie Martin – data update

Pete Weall upgraded his recent activities

Chris Edwards has moved to Kinross

7th V.S.M.A. Reunion 2019:

A full report with photographs has been published on the website! Click here to view it now. It turned out to be a very successful and enjoyable event – and we made a small surplus of just over £100.

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BREXIT IN GOLFING TERMS

At the Golf Club……….

Ladies Captain, Mrs May, has resigned from her Golf Club, and is returning her locker key, when Mr Barnier, the Membership Secretary, sees her.

“Hello, Mrs May,” says a cheerful Mr Barnier. “I’m so sorry to hear you are no longer renewing your club membership. Please come to my office, and we can settle your account.”

“I have paid my bar bill,” says Mrs May.

“Ah yes Mrs May,” says Mr Barnier, “but there are other matters to be settled.”

In Mr Barnier’s office, Mrs May repeats that she has settled her bar bill, so wonders what else she can possibly owe the Golf Club.

“Well, Mrs May,” begins Mr Barnier, “you did agree to buy one of our new Club jackets?”

“Yes,” says Mrs May “I did agree to buy a jacket but I haven’t received it yet. As soon as you supply the jacket I will send you a cheque for the full amount.”

“That will not be possible” explains Mr Barnier. “As you are no longer a club member you will not be entitled to wear one of our jackets.”

“But you still want me to pay for it?” exclaims Mrs May.

“Yes,” says Mr Barnier, “That will be £500 for the jacket, as it has already been ordered in your size. There is also your bar bill.”

“But I’ve already settled my bar bill,” says Mrs May. “I told you that.”

“Indeed,” says Mr Barnier, “but as you can appreciate, we need to place our orders with the liquor suppliers in advance, to ensure our bar is properly stocked, and you regularly used to spend at least £50 a week in the bar, so we have placed orders accordingly for the coming year. You therefore owe us £2500 for that.”

“Will you still allow me to have those drinks?” asks Mrs May.

“Certainly not Mrs May,” says Mr Barnier. You are no longer a club member!”

“Next is your restaurant bill” continues Mr Barnier. “In the same manner, we have to make arrangements in advance with our catering suppliers. Your average restaurant bill was in the order of £300 a month, so we require payment of £3,600 for the next year.”

“I don’t suppose you’ll be letting me have those meals either,” says Mrs May.

“No, of course not,” says a clearly irritated Mr Barnier. “You are no longer a club member!”

Mr Barnier continues. “Then there are the repairs to the clubhouse roof.”

“Clubhouse roof!” exclaims Mrs May, “What has that got to do with me?”

“Well it still needs to be repaired, and the damage occurred while you were a member, and the builders are coming in next week. Your share of the bill is £2000.”

“I see,” says Mrs May. “Is there anything else?”

“Now you mention it” says Mr Barnier, “there is Fred the barman’s pension. We would like you to pay £5 a week towards Fred’s pension when he retires next month. He’s not well you know, so I doubt we’ll need to ask you for payment for more than about five years, so £1300 should do it. That brings your total bill to £10,000″ says Mr Barnier.

“Let me get this straight,” says Mrs May. “You want me to pay £500 for a jacket you won’t let me have, £2600 for beverages you won’t let me drink, and £3600 for food you won’t let me eat, all under a roof where I won’t be allowed to sit, while not being served by a man who is going to retire next month on a pension paid for by me?”

“Yes, it’s all perfectly clear and quite reasonable,” says Mr Barnier. “And could I just say what a remarkable grasp of the situation you have!”

But Mr Barnier continues. “And of course, as you were Ladies Captain, I think it would be appropriate for the members to hold a small dinner to mark your excellent and generous period of membership. There will only be 27 of them, so the bill shouldn’t be more than £4,000 or so. We can forward it to you after the event.”

So I don’t get to attend that dinner myself?” asks Mrs May.

”Well of course not” says Mr Barnier. “How could you? You are not a member!”

Now we understand Brexit!

©Malcolm Parkin 2019

Advice from an Expert – Bill Barr

Why men shouldn’t write advice columns

Dear John,

I hope you can help me. The other day, I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching TV. My car stalled, and then it broke down about a mile down the road, and I had to walk back to get my husband’s help. When I got home, I couldn’t believe my eyes. He was in our bedroom with the neighbour’s daughter!

I am 32, my husband is 34 and the neighbour’s daughter is 19. We have been married for 10 years. When I confronted him, he broke down and admitted they had been having an affair for the past six months. He won’t go to counselling, and I’m afraid I am a wreck and need advice urgently. Can you help please?

Sincerely, Sheila.

Dear Sheila,.

A car stalling after being driven short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine Start by checkin that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the vacuum pipes and hoses on the intake manifold and also check all grounding wires. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel-pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the injectors;

I hope this helps,

John

That’s all folks………………. !

Stuart Parker, December 2019 Back to top

Remember, older news items can be found in the “Archived News Items” page. We would welcome additional photographs for any of the pages, but in particular we would love to be able to insert “mug shots” of people on their own page. This would let other members put a face to a name. So, if you have not already done so, dig out a recent photograph of your self and send it to me (in digital format) by email or send the original by post which I can copy and return to you.
If you would like to add anything (within reason) to the site, just send the copy to me and I will do the rest.

News

Newsletter, July 2019

Let’s not mention the weather. We are off to Islay for our annual sojourn there. This time for just a week with my daughter and her family. For the past 50 years it has been one of our favourite destinations. Now my daughter has taken it for the grandchildren. They get so much freedom there compared with Singapore where they presently live.

The above image was taken in the 1976 Scottish Rally. Brian Culcheth’s Triumph TR7 with Johnstone Syer – notice that the engine exploded while in mid air.——————————————————————————————————————————————————————

V.S.M.A. Reunion – Friday, 25th October 2019

Although it is about 15 weeks to our 7th Reunion, entries are slowly coming in. As I mentioned in an email I have amended the Entry Form to allow you to fillet in online and email it back to me, provide you have paid the monies to the VSMA bank account by BACS (which I am assured by Chairman Jimmy is very easy)! The VSMA Bank details are on the Entry Form.

As to the Reunion its self we have managed to get Brian Culcheth as our Principal guest. Those in the rallying side of our sport will remember that he had an amazing career, and is said to be a good after-dinner speaker. In addition to this attraction we have managed to acquire three vintage Rally cars (70’s to 90’s) for display in the reception area of the Reunion, along with the usual display motorsport boards. It all looks good. So, if you haven’t managed along before give it a try – you will be certain to enjoy what’s offer PLUS meet up with old friends. Here are the appropriate “Regs and Entry Forms” to download, along with details on how to book accommodation in the Hotel if you are considering staying-over for the night.

2019 Reunion Regs. 2019 Reunion – Entry Form. 2019 Hotel Info

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New Members:

I am delighted to welcome Ian McRae, Gartcosh, Lanarkshire to membership of the Association. As usual, some details on his Motorsport career can be found on clicking his name in the “Members List” on the website

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New Email addresses:

Ken Rundle’s email address is now : krundle009@gmail.com

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To make you smile again (I hope) but please don’t take it to heart!

Love this Japanese Doctor!

Q: Doctor, I’ve heard that cardiovascular exercise can prolong life. Is this true?

Heart only good for so many beats, and that it… Don’t waste on exercise. Everything wear out eventually. Speeding up heart not make you live longer; it like saying you extend life of car by driving faster. Want to live longer? Take nap.

Q: Should I reduce my alcohol intake?

Oh no. Wine made from fruit. Fruit very good. Brandy distilled wine, that mean they take water out of fruity bit so you get even more of goodness that way. Beer also made of grain. Grain good too. Bottoms up!

Q: How can I calculate my body/fat ratio?

Well, if you have body and you have fat, your ratio one to one. If you have two body, your ratio two to one.

Q: What are some of the advantages of participating in a regular exercise program?

Can’t think of one, sorry. My philosophy: No pain…good!

Q: Aren’t fried foods bad for you?

YOU NOT LISTENING! Food fried in vegetable oil. How getting more vegetable be bad?

Q: Will sit-ups help prevent me from getting a little soft around the middle?

Oh no! When you exercise muscle, it get bigger. You should only be doing sit-up if you want bigger stomach.

Q: Is chocolate bad for me?

You crazy?!? HEL-LO-O!! Cocoa bean! Another vegetable! It best feel-good food around!

Q: Is swimming good for your figure?

If swimming good for figure, explain whale to me.

Q: Is getting in shape important for my lifestyle?

Hey! ‘Round’ is shape! Well… I hope this has cleared up any misconceptions you may have had about food and diets.
And remember: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways -Chardonnay in one hand – chocolate in the other – body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming “WOO-HOO, what a ride!!”
AND….. For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.

The Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
The Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
The Italians drink a lot of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.
The Germans drink a lot of beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Brits.

CONCLUSION:

Eat and drink whatever you like.
Speaking English is actually what kills you.——————————————————————————————————————————————————————

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That’s all folks………………. ! Stuart Parker, July 2019 Back to top

Remember, older news items can be found in the “Archived News Items” page. We would welcome additional photographs for any of the pages, but in particular we would love to be able to insert “mug shots” of people on their own page. This would let other members put a face to a name. So, if you have not already done so, dig out a recent photograph of your self and send it to me (in digital format by email or send the original by post which I can copy and return to you).

News

Newsletter June, 2019

Newsletter, June 2019

Hi there. Apart from the recent Spring Tour there has been little activity in the VSMA world. The report of the Spring Tour to Cumbria can be found in our website in the events/Run Section.

Members Database Changes:

Below are changes members have submitted to me. All the details can be found in the Members List section and clicking on the member’s name

New Email addresses:

David Seaton’s address is now: transport@freightexpress.co.uk

Logan Morrison can now be found at: val.morrison7@talktalk.net

Deaths:

I have to report the death of Derek Hastings from Biggar. He joined VSMA 1983 having been involved in Racing and speed events until farely recently.

A new Director is to be co-opted to the Board of VSMA, namely Jack Davidson. As you may know Jack is a former freelance photojournalist on motor sport, and contributed event reports and articles to “The Press and Journal”, “Motoring News” (now “Motorsport News”), newspapers and “Rally Car” magazine. He also wrote and produced five volumes of “Motor Sports Extra”, the history of the Scottish Hill Climb Championship from 1970 to 1999. Originally from Stonehaven, he spent the vast majority of his working life based in Aberdeen, but upon retirement, relocated to Winchburgh in West Lothian.

He sent me the press release of his latest book on David Gillanders, which I have attached below.

PRESS RELEASE: May 30, 2019

ABERDEEN’S FORMER CHAMPION RALLY DRIVER WINS WITH HIS NEW BOOK

Aberdeen champion rally driver, David Gillanders, who won the British National Rally Championship in 1987 and then the Scottish Rally Championship in 1995, has written, or to be more precise, dictated some 95,402 words for his book: ‘DAVID GILLANDERS – I do all the talking!’

The formal launch will be held in the Malmaison Hotel, 49-53 Queen’s Road, Aberdeen, AB15 4YP, on Thursday, June 13, 2019 at 5.30 pm. A number of Gillanders’ former co-drivers are expected to be in attendance.

The idea for a book occurred in 2015. David, having suffered a serious heart attack, was lying in hospital surrounded by his family, and quite frankly contemplating a bleak future; he thought the time had come to write down the story of his life, mainly for the benefit of his children and grandchildren. This simple idea of a family legacy has, after a lot of work and input from various sources, blossomed into an extremely readable and enjoyable book about not only motor sport, but of a varied and extremely interesting life, a life lived to the full.

The Foreword is written by Malcolm Wilson, OBE, Managing Director of M-Sport, the World Rally Championship manufacturer of the M-Sport Ford World Rally Team Fiesta, and contributions throughout the book have been provided by the Late Colin McRae’s former co-driver, Nicky Grist, former Austin Rover Group Motorsport Director, John Davenport, and several of the Aberdonian’s former co-drivers throughout his long career.

In the book, Gillanders also tells of the time he communicated with two US Presidents (and met with one), the breakfast he shared with a top female Hollywood star, his flight in a fighter jet, a sail on a former Americas’ Cup yacht, fishing on a North Sea seine net trawler, and of having his helicopter stolen, not to mention many more incidents involving the sport of Special Stage Rallying which culminated in two major championship titles.

The paperback is to be published by FastPrint Publishing towards the end of June, 2019, but for anyone who cannot wait until then, pre-publication copies (with a free bookmark) can be purchased at the formal launch, or directly from Jack Davidson. The book comprises 360 pages (of which 8 are in full colour) and sports 237 photographs from 57 varieties of photographer. The cover price is £15.00 + £4.00 p&p (UK).

Further information can be provided by Jack Davidson:

e-Mail: info@davidgillanders6r4.com
Telephone: 07736 679520
facebook.

To make you smile (I hope):

I couldn’t finish this short Newsletter without including something I thought might tickle you ! It certainly amused me. This is from a colleague in the U.S.A.

The following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student. The answer by this student was so ‘profound’ that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:

Bonus Question:

Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law, (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed), or some

variant. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely.
I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially.

Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose .
If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, ‘It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,’ and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.

The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct……..leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ‘Oh my God.’

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

That’s all folks………………. ! Stuart Parker, June 2019 Back to top

Remember, older news items can be found in the “Archived News Items” page. We would welcome additional photographs for any of the pages, but in particular we would love to be able to insert “mug shots” of people on their own page. This would let other members put a face to a name. So, if you have not already done so, dig out a recent photograph of your self and send it to me (in digital format via the “Upload a File” page or send the original by post which I can copy and return to you).
If you would like to add anything (within reason) to the site, just follow the instructions on either the “Upload a File” or “Upload an Item” pages and we will do the rest.

News

Newsletter – February 2019

Newsletter, February 2019

You should know that since the Newsletter in November we have two lots of sad news. Firstly, was the death of John Smith, husband of Pat and more recently the death of Kenny Allen. You can see details for both these gentlemen in the Past Veterans section. The image above taken some years ago, shows Kenny Allen working at his desk with his famous Lotos Elan in the forecourt of his garage in Crossford. A good many members were at Kenny’s funeral, both at the Church Service in Crossford and later at the Crematorium in Holytown.

2019 Spring Run

Already, Bob Baillie has had 19 rooms confirmed for the Hotel headquarters. One of the major highlights of this Run is a visit to M-Sport in Cumbria. Anyone who has visited this establishment raves about for a long time thereafter! If you are considering coming to this event I would advise getting your entry in ASAP before Bob runs out of accommodation! In case you have misplaced the Entry Form, etc, here they are again

7th V.S.M.A. Reunion 2019

If you remember from a previous Newsletter our next Reunion will be held in the Hilton Dunblane Hydo Hotel on Friday 25th October, 2019. Details will be issued at a later date, however if you wish to reserve accommodation for the Friday evening clicking here will take you to the appropriate page.

New Member:

I am delighted to welcome the following to membership of the Association. Their details can be found on clicking their name in the “Members List” on the website:

Tom Wilson, Lanark

Frank Lethbridge

Member’s contact changes:

Geoff Stone has changed his email address to mail4gps@gmail.com

Member’s Stuff:

Just received member Eric Dymock’s latest Blog on the Morgan Plus 8. Those with Morgans will surely find this an interesting read!

Bar Codes:

Here’s a few interesting things you might want to know about Bar Codes or really where stuff actually comes from. With all the food and pet products now coming from China , it is best to make sure you read the label when buying products especially at Tesco / Asda. The whole world is concerned about China-made “black hearted goods” but can you differentiate which one is made in Taiwan or China, or elsewhere for that matter? Nowadays, Chinese businessmen know that consumers do not prefer products “MADE IN CHINA “, so they don’t show from which country it is made.

Many products no longer show where they were made, only give where the distributor is located. It is important to read the bar code to track it’s origin.

If the first 3 digits of the barcode are 690 691 or 692, the product is MADE IN CHINA.

However, you may now refer to the barcode – remember if the first 3 digits are:

690-692 … Then it is MADE IN CHINA
00 – 09 … USA & CANADA
30 – 37…. FRANCE
40 – 44... GERMANY
49 … JAPAN
471 …. Taiwan
50 … UK

SO, if you want to BUY ‘BRITISH’ by watching for “50” at the beginning of the number. Perhaps, it mat be worth printing this and cutting it out to have in your wallet or purse

Some YouTube and other funnies to hopefully brighten your day!

Where did I Park – Bill Barr.rtfd

Tom Rush – Remember Song

A Lucky Yellow Marble!

A Classic One Ronnie Sketch – For Computer Geeks

From Marylin Jack:

I was lying around, pondering the problems of the world, I realized that at my age I don’t really give a damn anymore.

If walking is good for your health the postman would be immortal.

A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water, but is still fat.

A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years, while a tortoise doesn’t run and does mostly nothing, yet it lives for 150 years.

And you tell me to exercise?? I don’t think so.

Just grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked, and the good fortune to remember the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.

That’s all folks………………. ! Stuart Parker, February 2019

News

Newsletter, December 2018

Xmas will soon be here, so just a few words of cheer! I felt the above image of Sandy and Logan Morrison in the 1962 Monte Carlo Rally was perhaps quite appropriate. We have had 3 new members since the last Newsletter –

Ian Buttery from Larkhall

Carol Cooper from Kilsyth

James Pinkerton from Glasgow

Clicking on one of the above will reveal their details.

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14th Annual General Meeting – 7th December, 2018 –

This was again in Tunnock’s Uddingston premises, curtesy of VSMA member Boyd Tunnoch. As usual, it was a very brief and unremarkable affair. There were 19 members in total who managed to attend! As expected, there was no change in the Board of management, the following being re-elected to join standing Ordinary Board Members Duncan paterson, Barry Crichton, Ian smillie and Donald Gordon.

Chairman – James W. McInnes

Vice-Chairman and treasurer – Robert Bailie

Secretary – Stuart S I Parker

Ordinary Board Members – Mid Bruce, Charlie Young, Adele Paterson and Hugh MacKinnon

Following reports from the Chairman and Secretary, Treasurer Bob Baillie confirmed that our financial affairs were quite in order, and he went on to describe what was in store for us in the Spring Run in April. In particular he stated that we would be more than impressed with our proposed visit to M-Sport in the Lake district.

Some of the Members and Directors at the AGM – notice the pies were almost finished!

Chairman Jimmie closed the meeting with a thanks to all for attending and also to Tunnock’s for providing an excellent repast (as usual)!

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MG Car Club (Caledonian Section) Film Night

Following last year’s enjoyable evening Nancy Crichton of the MG Club has invited our members to their 3rd Film Night at Kirkintilloch Golf Club on Thursday 24th January from 6.30-9.30pm. The Golf Club are providing a light meal for £6.50 with a choice of Fish and Chips Lasagna or Macaroni Cheese with tea/coffee. We are cordially invited to join them. The instructions on their website (www.mgcaledonian com) are quite explicit for non members.

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Finally, Bill Bar sent me an amusing YouTube video clip which I think will bring a smile to your face PLUS a happy feeling at this time of the year!

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Stuart Parker, Secretary V.S.M.A.

News

Newsletter, November 2018

November is upon us – and soon it will be Xmas!! Before that however, is a very important event, the Annual General Meeting of V.S.M.A. As before this will be held in the staff room of Tunnock’s factory in Uddingston on Friday the December at 6.00pm. Below are details in relation to the AGM.

An additonal item to this Newsletter is the information that Bob Baillie has just released details of the 2019 Spring Run. Here is his invitation to you and below that are PDFs of the ASRs, Entry Form and Hotel Booking Form, to allow you to enter the event. PLEASE NOTE THAT ENTERIES FOR THIS EVENT WILL BE TAKEN ON A “FIRST COME FIRST SERVED”BASIS.

November 2018

Dear Member,

Spring Run 2019. ——- Friday 26th. April – Monday 29th. April 2019.

We have reached the time of year for organising the Spring Run. For 2019 we are venturing into Cumbria with the highlight being a visit to the headquarters of M-sport near Cockermouth.

The Newby Bridge Hotel have reserved 20 – 25 rooms for us for the weekend and these will be allocated on first come first served so please get your entries in early to avoid disappointment.

The rates for the hotel per person on a Dinner, Bed and Breakfast basis are as follows :

2 Nights – £119.00 3 Nights – £169.00

The official proceedings will start with us meeting in the Dumfries area at a Garden Centre yet to be decided. We would be aiming to leave Dumfries by 11.30am. The morning run will simply be from our meeting point down to M-sport for a tour around the premises. The set up here is mind blowing.

Due to numbers, we will be divided into two groups with tours one after the other. The tours will last approximately an hour and a half and there will be a break between tours. Refreshments will be available on site before and after the tour.

On Saturday morning the run is very short taking us to Lakeland Motor Museum and this is followed by a sail from Lakeside on Lake Windermere to Bowness-on-Windermere. After time for browsing Bowness, the boat returns us to Lakeside. Transport from Lakeland Motor Museum to Lakeside and return is by coach.

Sunday will involve a trip to the Stott Park Bobbin Mill followed by the Crystal Factory at Ulverston and the Docks Museum at Barrow-in-Furness. The return from Barrow-in-Furness to Newby Bridge will be via the Coastal Route.

On Monday we leave after breakfast and, since there is no set route to follow, you can choose your own way back home.

This is just a broad outline of the weekend and could be subject to change. I hope that you find the proposed Spring Run of interest. The numbers able to attend are restricted and I would stress again the need for early booking.

Yours sincerely

Bob Baillie, Vice Chairman VSMA.

2019 Spring Run ASRs 2019 Spring Run Entry Form 2019 Spring Run Hotel Booking Form

Annual General Meeting:

This will start sharp at 6.0pm when a light snack has been laid on, courtesy of Boyd Tunnock. Here is the Location. All members are more than welcome to attend this important event. If you are unable to attend, please complete the Proxy form and send it to me. Here is the Agenda, Proxy and Nomination Forms which will give you all the information you require for the evening. Can I point out that the Nomination Form, duly completed, must be in my hands by 16th November 2018 at the latest.

New member:

I welcome another new member since last Newsletter, namely

Graham Smith for Napton, Southam in Warwickshire

All Graham’s details can be viewed in his profile page in the Members List.

New email addresses:

Ian Forrest’s address is now : i_forrest@bitwisegroup.com
Kenneth Gunn address is now: williamgunn546@yahoo.com

2018 Autumn Run: – Sunday 7^th October 2018 – The Story

This would be the third Autumn Run organised by Charlie Young and Eddie Hawke and the plan in moving to a Perth start was hopefully encourage VSMA members further North and East to participate. This unfortunately was not to be the case.

In starting our final reccie and on route to Perth, we received a call from our finish venue – The Boathouse Restaurant in Kilysth. This to inform us that they had ceased trading the previous evening and could we call and they would return our deposit. A good way to start the day!!

Anyway, to the event and starting at Dobbies Garden Center just to the West of Perth proved an excellent venue, where the management could not have been more helpful for the assembled lowly fourteen crews. The numbers were to be further reduced when firstly Chris & Mary Paton phoned to say that his Cooper S had ground to a halt near Kinross whilst heading for the start. Removing the rocker cover revealed a sheared rocker shaft and hopefully no further damage. Second casualty was the Porsche Boxster of Margaret & Ian Smillie – simply they got their dates wrong and were convinced that the event was the following weekend. So, we are now down to twelve starters.

The Route:

The first car left at 12.00 on the dot, heading West past Huntingtower to turn right onto 8083 at Methven. The promise of sunshine in glorious Perthshire was not forthcoming with the weather starting to deteriorate and rain falling. From Methven they turned left left signposted Fowlis Wester then straight on over the offset crossroads at Fowlis Wester, past Quarter Bank and Raith before turning right at Kinkell Bridge and left at the next T junction and almost immediate left at Drumness – still no road numbers!!

From Drumness straight over the crossroads with the A823 (a road number at last) and then T junction left onto the A822 and almost immediate right on the unmarked road at Kaims Castle and the old Roman Fort before turning left at the crossroads onto the old Military Road and down into Braco.

Side road right in Braco onto the B8033 took the crews down past Wester Feddal and Mid Cambushinne to Kinbuck. Continuing on the B8033, then a hard left onto the main A9 next to the Queen Victoria School for a short drive down to the main roundabout at Dunblane. Taking the second exit, they were heading now on the old A9 for Bridge of Allan and looking for a sharp right onto the unmarked road sign posted Old Keir. This was a cracking piece of road taking crews past Craigarn Hall / Easter Row and Hillside of Row before T junction left onto the B824, and then T left onto the A820 into Doune. Through Doune, crews were looking for the B826 on the right and heading for Thornhill. Before Thornhill, they took a left at the T junction onto the A873, turning right onto the B8031 past Craighead and South Mid Frew,and turning left onto the A811

Passing Boquhan Home Farm they were then onto a side road right to an offset crossroads left and right. Past Glentirranmuir / Auldhall, down past Craigend and then T left onto the B822 and then T left in Fintry onto the B818. Continuing left on the B818 the crews were now onto the Carron Valley road before taking a right turn onto the Tak Me Doon Road

Located almost at the end of the Tak Me Doon road was the new finish venue – Kilsyth and Lennox Golf Club where again the Club Manager and staff were very extremely help full .

The choice of several one courses with tea and coffee was well received and the day was finished off with a quiz.

All in all a good run, on good surfaces and some seventy plus miles enjoyed by all. The promised views of glorious Perthshire had not materialised with the weather turning really nasty by the time the crews had reached the finish. Good luck to next year’s organisers!!

Charlie Young

Many, many thanks to Charlie and Eddie for another enjoyable run – pity about the numbers, and of course thanks for the above narrative.

Stuart Parker

Goodwood Festival of Speed:

Eric Dymock sent in this YouTube video for your interest.

Amusing YouTube Clip:

This I’m sure will make you laugh!

I’m running out of “funnies” but here is an old one from/for our beloved Charman:

Perks of reaching or being over 65

Perks of reaching or being over 65 and heading towards 80 and beyond!

1. Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

2. In a hostage situation, you are likely to be released first.

3. No one expects you to run — anywhere.

4. People call at 9 PM (or 9 AM) and ask, ‘Did I wake you?’

5. People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

6. There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

7. Things you buy now will never wear out.

8. You can eat supper at 4 PM.

9. You can live without sex but not your glasses.

10. You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

11. You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

12. You quit trying to hold your stomach in no matter who walks into the room.

13. You sing along with elevator music.

14. Your eyes won’t get Much worse.

15. Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

16. Your joints are more accurate than meteorologist or the national weather service.

17. Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.

18. Your supply of brain cells is finally down to a manageable size.

19. You can’t remember who sent you this list. And you notice these are all in big print for your convenience.

Forward this to everyone you can remember right now!

AND THE MOST IMPORTANT THING: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill, and a laxative on the same night!

That’s all folks………………. ! Stuart Parker, November 2018

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News

Newsletter, September 2018

Hello there,

We have had only a few comments regardng the new website – all good thankfully! However no images or articles from members! One waits in hope! If you feel you have something that would interst members don’t hesitate to send it in. The next VSMA event is the forthcoming Autumn Run in October (see details below).

Here are few changes of members details since the last update, however, I’m not sure if I have sent these amendments below to you earlier? All can be found in the Members List.

New Addresses:

John More and Jim McGaughay

Email Address changes:

William Cowan new email address : wgcowan@waitrose.com
James Crichton new email address : jamescrichton1952@gmail.com
James McGaughay new email address : james.mcgaughay@gmail.com
Bill Struthers new email address : billanann@hotmail.co.uk
Brian Wilson new email address : bwilson586@yahoo.com

Deaths which you might not be aware of:

Helen Morrison wife of Sandy died on Friday 6th July.
Anne Melvin, wife of John died in September 2017 having being in care for past 3 years. Anne was a co-driver/navigator in John’s early days of Rallying. Indeed they won the R.S.A.C. husband and wife prize in a pre-special stage Scottish rally in the 50s. She had a quiet family-only burial in Eaglesham.

New Members:

I am delighted to welcome this new member into our fold:

John Bennie from Glasgow

John’s details can be found in his profile in the Members List.

2018 Autumn Run – Sunday 7th October

Put the above date in your diary for another event being run by Charlie Young:

……..In an effort to encourage enthusiasts from more northern and eastern locations, the event will start in Perth and finish in Kilsyth covering some 70 / 80 miles between venues – most in glorious Perthshire.

Food will be available at the start and finish venues.

Regulations and Entry Form will be sent to previous entrants, but here are two PDFs of the Releveant documents. They will also be posted to the Caledonian Classic & Historic Club website.

2018 Autumn Run Regulations 2018 Autumn Run Entry Form

Further details are available from the Secretary of the Meeting:-

Charlie Young

1 Sandhead Road

Strathaven

ML10 6HX

Tel: 01357 521696 / 07955 905441

charlieyoung2009@sky.com

Interesting YouTube Video:

Here is a video taken from films shot in New York in 1911 with an added sound tract. Some marvellous old cars, etc. Enjoy

Some Amusing Items:

Here is a Youtube I received to day wihich I found engrossing – The Lucky Yellow Marble – it seem to go on and on.

No Newletter would be complete without some funnies from our “Beloved Leader”!!

Dublin’s contestant in an international quiz was waiting for his first question.

“First, what is your name and occupation?” The compere asked. “Pass” came the reply.

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Casey…..”if you can guess how many chooks I have in my bag, you can have both of them.” “Three?” suggested Shaun.

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O’Toole was coming through the customs at the airport carrying a large bottle.

“What have you got there?” said a suspicious customs officer. “Tis Lourdes holy water I am bringing home with me.” said O’Toole. The officer took the bottle and tried some. “Why, tis Irish whiskey to be sure” he spluttered.

“Lord Bless Me!” said O’Toole, “another bloomin’ miracle”

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On his way home one right Regan dropped into the pub.

The barman poured him a beer and asked if he wanted to be in a raffle. What’s it for?” asked Regan.

“It’s for a poor widow with 13 kids,” said the barman.

Regan shook his head. “No good for me, I’d never be able to keep em.”

Well folks, that’s all for this Newsletter. I wish you all well.

Yours aye

Stuart S I Parker, Secretary, Veterans of Scottish Motorsport Association

Veterans of Scottish Motorsport Association

Saturday 21st April 2001

After supper people continued to talk and talk; a few still tried their hand at the simulator – but eventually, we all drifted off home having enjoyed a most memorable evening.

Footnote: After the dust had settled and sums had been added up, we found we had had a surplus which, along with the money from the simulator entries, enabled us to donate £475 to the Red Cross.

Programme

……….The Evening’s Schedule………

18.30 – 19.45 Documentation and Scrutineering, in the Foyer of RSAC

19.30 – 22.00 Competition

19.45 ‘Welcome’ in Regent Room . . . . . . . .J.W. McInnes

19.30 – 23.30 Video Show in Regent Lounge (upstairs)

20.00 – 22.00 Buffet

22.30 Prizegiving, in Regent Room

23.30 Parc Ferme opens for release of Zimmers, Wheelchairs, white sticks, etc.

Ford Half Buck Simulator Competition

2001 ASRs

Entrants and Classes

……..Couldn’t Manage

Ian Birrell, Helensburgh

Jenny Birrell, Shalstone, Bucks

Graham Bisset, Kincardine

Bill Borrowman, Edinburgh

Arnold Clark, Glasgow

Bill Clarkson, Balfron

Geoff Duncan, Bridge of Weir

Barry Filer, Glasgow

Graham Gauld, Claviers, France

Sandy Gentles, Perth

Ian Hawthorn, Uplawmoor

Colin Hope, Helensburgh

Ian Hutchison, Newton Mearns

Frank Inglis, Largs

Tony Luck, Perth

Alan Lundholm, Torrance

Hugh McCaig, Penicuik

George McCartney, Motherwell

Gray Mickel, Moscow, Ayrshire

Bill Millar, Glasgow

Tony Mitchell, Strathaven

Ian D. Muir, County Clare, Eire

Andy Munn, Glasgow

Mervyn Nicol, Perth

Ian Preston, Clarkston

George Ritchie, Newton Mearns

Ian Stewart, Crieff

Jackie Stewart,O.B.E., Milton Keynes

David Thomson, Duns

Gerry Ward, Kilmacolm

‘What a shame that we now qualify for the Veterans Tag!……. ………………… Graham Lees, Lendelfoot

‘……a good idea to reminisce about Motor Sport when it was a Sport and not big business. I couldn’t afford a trailer and tow car when I was rallying!!!!’ ………………………Fred Hibberd, Dundee

‘………..good idea to have such a reunion before we Old Boys pop off’ …………Ronnie Dalgleish, Auchterarder

‘make sure there is parking space for my zimmer, that the name tags are in 48pt type!” type!’ ………………...Wendy Jones, Edinburgh

‘……….. most prestigious event of the Motor Sport Calendar’ ……………….. Alex Houliston, Barrhead

‘What a splendid idea! Almost respectability at last!!’ ……………………...Ian Smillie, Milngavie

‘………McInnes will remember the night in North Berwick or was it Dunbar, when Ella helped to debag Jimmy!!’ …………… Bobby Crawford, Milnathorp

‘……………….a blast from the past, on any scale!!’ ……………….Willie Crawford, Lasswade

‘…..have a mega evening; my regards to anyone who remembers the ‘Good’ years in Scottish Motorsport and my antics!!!’ ………………Jenny Birrell, Shalstone, Bucks

‘What a great idea………..could be the best event in the 2001 calendar’ ……………..George Sangster, Montrose

‘………getting my lightweight, racing zimmer ready for scrutineering!’ ………………………Donald Brown, Cults

‘……..Less of the Veterans Please. Look forward to a good night’ ……………………John Cleland, Melrose

‘Reading the names alone has raised nostalgic memories – Oh Happy Days’ ……………………..Andy Munn, Glasgow

‘great idea…….look forward to an evening of hilarity and boasting.’ ………………….Fred Lobnitz, Stewarton

Newsletter – September, 2020

New Member:

Some Funnies:

Newsletter – April, 2020

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Deaths:

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New Email addresses:

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New Members:

Some Funnies:

Newsletter, December 2019

Annual General Meeting – 6th December

Death of Member:

New Member:

Member’s contact changes and New Email addresses:

Some more website Updates:

7th V.S.M.A. Reunion 2019:

BREXIT IN GOLFING TERMS

‘What a shame that we now qualify for the Veterans Tag!…….
………………… Graham Lees, Lendelfoot

‘……a good idea to reminisce about Motor Sport when it was a Sport and not big business. I couldn’t afford a trailer and tow car when I was rallying!!!!’
………………………Fred Hibberd, Dundee

‘………..good idea to have such a reunion before we Old Boys pop off’
…………Ronnie Dalgleish, Auchterarder

‘……….. most prestigious event of the Motor Sport Calendar’
……………….. Alex Houliston, Barrhead

‘What a splendid idea! Almost respectability at last!!’
……………………...Ian Smillie, Milngavie

‘………McInnes will remember the night in North Berwick or was it Dunbar, when Ella helped to debag Jimmy!!’
…………… Bobby Crawford, Milnathorp

‘……………….a blast from the past, on any scale!!’
……………….Willie Crawford, Lasswade

‘…..have a mega evening; my regards to anyone who remembers the ‘Good’ years in Scottish Motorsport and my antics!!!’
………………Jenny Birrell, Shalstone, Bucks

‘What a great idea………..could be the best event in the 2001 calendar’
……………..George Sangster, Montrose

‘………getting my lightweight, racing zimmer ready for scrutineering!’
………………………Donald Brown, Cults

‘……..Less of the Veterans Please. Look forward to a good night’
……………………John Cleland, Melrose

‘Reading the names alone has raised nostalgic memories – Oh Happy Days’
……………………..Andy Munn, Glasgow

‘great idea…….look forward to an evening of hilarity and boasting.’
………………….Fred Lobnitz, Stewarton